Uni isn't going great at the moment; I'm really struggling with my lectures and keeping up with all the reading. I've been so tired and I can't concentrate properly. I had a three hour lecture today that just made no sense to me and then we got set a practical on it.
There was a graph we had to draw and I redrew it several times and I still couldn't get it right. So I decided to go outside to smoke and then when I came back in I still couldn't get my head around it and I ended up missing my lecturer explaining it because I was still trying to draw it. Then he suggested that we should try doing it on excel in our own time, which was really annoying because I had my laptop with me and I could have just done that in the first place and it would have been so much easier.
He was talking and I was so stressed and panicked about it all that I ended up walking out because I was on the verge of tears. I ended up in the toilets crying and then I had to go back to get my stuff and it was horrible. I haven't felt that bad since college. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I feel a bit better now, but the heating isn't working at my student house and its freezing. It should get sorted in a few days but I just can't be dealing with it right now.
I've been so close to cutting myself again this week, but I've managed not to so hopefully I'll be ok. My hands are still hurting from the eczema but they're getting better. I should feel a bit better after the weekend because I think the main problem is the lack of sleep I've had recently. My boyfriend's back tomorrow and I'm sure getting to see him will cheer me up a bit.
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