Friday 27 October 2017

Day 32 of university

So much for getting my arm tattoo soon, now it's covered in scratches and cuts. The tattoo place hasn't been open when I've been going past for a few weeks though so I haven't been able to go in anyway.

It was my nan's birthday yesterday. I didn't realise. For some reason I actually checked Facebook and I saw all the photos people had put up of her. I walked into my parents house and my nan's teddy bear was there; my mum was giving it to my niece to look after. I'm sure they think it's cute and it is a nice idea but suddenly having everything relating to her everywhere again is too much. Maybe that's why I felt so bad last night. I cut my legs and arms again. They sting so much right now it's unreal.

Everyone in my lectures keeps making suicide jokes and it's fucking doing my head in. I wish they'd stop but me licking up a fuss about it would probably just make it worse so I'm trying my best to ignore it.

I'm sure I'll feel better soon. Here's to hoping.

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