Tuesday 28 February 2017

Day 175 of university

I put henna on my left arm about a week ago so that I would keep to the whole not cutting it thing, which I have done because I wouldn't cut over it. But I've been really stressed over my assignments and ended up cutting my right arm a couple of days ago.

The weird thing is that I had this moment when I couldn't feel it. I could see the blood but it didn't hurt. I only intended to do a couple of cuts but I wanted to feel something so I kept going.

I submitted one of my assignments yesterday so I'm feeling a bit better. I smoked something like 17 cigarettes on the process yesterday though so I'm really struggling today as I only have 3 left that need to last - I've had 2 already. I can't buy more because I'm supposed to be stopping tomorrow.

I've just realized how much I'm worrying my best friend though. She said she'd been on here and read my posts. I think she's slightly overreacting because she's comparing me smoking and drinking to Sherlock's drug addiction. But I can sort of see where she's coming from, that's why I need to stop. After all I promised everyone I would.

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